Shitty Corel Painter Bullshit

And Some Other Silly Bullshit

This is some silly shit I just made. I’ve been quite depressed of late, and that always sucks.

This morning my regularly scheduled panic attack was interrupted by catastrophic diarrhea, and that sucked too, but it was a change of pace, and that’s always nice.

This is some more shitty Painter shit I made today. I’ve been suffering from creative block, which is what I have decided to call it even though I know I’m really being lazy and failing to confront my own insecurities and fears.

I spent the day today reading and watching YouTube videos. That’s not entirely true, I went out this morning to do some street photography, something I haven’t done much of since the entire fucking country lost their mind toward the end of last year; but a security guard at the mall I was at asked me to leave and I decided to come back home and take another shit.

Above is a video that came across my screen this morning and I am very happy it did. If you have the time I’d highly recommend you check it out, check out this entire channel. I really hate YouTube and internet culture overall, but this channel gives me hope in the strangest way. They generate and curate an awful lot content that one might consider blackpilled, at the very least it’s all Breadpilled, and in a recent conversation with my partner I rediscovered just how catastrophic the Breadpill can be, but this channel maintains a strong Leftist bent while managing to be oddly optimistic.

My partner just finished reading Work Won’t Love You Back by Sara Jaffe and that’s something else I’d highly recommend. I asked her last night how she liked it, and she told me that it is a great book, but now she’s depressed as fuck. Then she made a joke about the fact that I always blame my depression and listlessness on Capitalism; she isn’t wrong, but it sucks. I remember when I used to be an angry little leftist, and I miss those days. The last decade or so I haven’t been able to muster much more than general distaste and disinterest. Oh, well, shit’ll work out eventually, one way or another.

My grandma texted me the other day and said some shit that really hurt my feelings. But then I thought about it and just started feeling bad for her. She’s old, I don’t know how old, but I know she’s old. She’s been through all kinds of shit in her life; she’s lost two husbands and one child, gone bankrupt, had all her money stolen by some church charity scam back in the nineties, and has been living alone in a secluded community for like the last ten years. But, I haven’t texted her back, I don’t know if I will.

Anyway, I do in fact have some things to do, and I think I might have the energy to get them done.

I hope each and every one of you (if any) who have made it this far into this post are in a good place, mentally and physically, and I hope you all are able to accomplish something worthwhile soon! Thank you for your time and attention, I’ll see you all soon!

Secular Humanist writer, photographer, and quintessential millennial dilettante. Check out https://threebillionbeats.com for more, you can even buy prints!

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